The Legend of Old Man Joad

by Marsheila Rockwell

Old Man Joad found out the hard way
You don't mix tequila and 'shine
The night he found his poor missus
In the woods, impaled on a pine

Her innards glistened like opals
And her skin was crusted with sap
About her neck was the wreckage
Of Old Man Joad's "special" bear trap

The one he baited with drugged meat
The one with the poison-tipped jaws
The one he set for the critter
With tracks more like feet than like paws

He got his gun from the mantle
And loaded it with iron shot
Took one last pull from his jug and
Called the sheriff – an afterthought

He tracked the thing through the forest
Cornered it behind a fir tree
Fired and then discovered he'd
Blown a hole in the deputy

Now Joad's the one who's been captured
Charged with two counts of murder, he
Sits in a cell on death row, while
The man-footed critter roams free